Allow me to start out with a question.
Your child gave their life to Jesus! PRAISE THE LORD!! HALLELUJAH!! Due to their desire to obey the Lord, they continuously and consistently requested to be baptized, but the church your family was apart of at the time, refused them. All because they wanted your child to go through a discipleship class, as a prerequisite and requirement, I must say, for baptism, prior to being baptized. How would you handle this situation?
My husband and I had to walk through this same situation with our son back in 2019. How we all guide our children through difficult situations is dependent on how the Lord guides. How the Lord leads us may or may not be how he leads others. For us, truth be told, my husband and I were very frustrated. However, we sought wise counsel, as the Bible instructs, and sought the Lord for direction. This...is how we guided our son through this emotional, revitalizing, and uplifting time.
But first, our son's salvation story...
The kitchen was finally cleaned up from dinner. The kiddos were all heading to bed. The hubby and I could get some one-on-one time ourselves before crashing out, as well. As we were walking through the kitchen, we realized that we had forgotten to put one side back into its proper place in the pantry. The chips. We glanced around the kitchen, and double checked the rest of the house to confirm that neither me nor my hubby had moved the chips to a different room. Nothing. This only meant one thing. One of our treasured arrows had snatched the bag up for themselves. My husband and I were frustrated. We aim to bring our children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and since He commands specifically in His Word, "Thou shalt not steal.", thievery is on of our biggest pet peeves. We questioned the children. Because no one owned up to the action, and it was bed time, we sent them to bed to get a good night's rest. I guess the Lord was working on my son's heart because shortly after, probably 5-10 minutes later, he came up to me...
"Mommy, I was the one who took the chips and ate them."
I looked at him. The Holy Spirit advised me not to say anything. Just by studying my son, I knew He was at work on my son's heart. Instead I took him by the hand, and led him to his Daddy, who was in our den. My husband explained to our son why it was wrong to have just taken the chips, gave him the Gospel message, and just put it all in the Lord's hands. All we could do now was to wait and watch the Lord work. A few minutes passed. Our son sat there chewing on all he had heard. He then turned to my husband...
"Daddy, can I go pray by myself?"
"Yes, Son. You may."
We watched as our son chose a corner in our den. He folded his hands. Bowed his head. No words could be heard, but we could see his lips move. Suddenly, he lifted his head up, and looked at both of us with a new found light and sparkle to his eyes that only a Child of God has.
"Mommy. Daddy. Guess what!?"
Our hearts could only hope and pray for what we desperately were wishing for to hear. Our hearts were pounding.
"I just asked the Lord to come to my heart, and save me from my sins."
Our hearts leaped into our throats, and tears streamed down our face as my husband and I, together embraced our son. The Lord had answered our prayer, and we praised and thanked Him for it. Our son had given his heart to Jesus. That day, our son woke up an old creation, but that night, he went to bed reborn, and a babe in Christ. (2 Corinthians 5:17, I Peter 2:2-4)
As a result of his becoming a new creature in Christ, our son was excited to share with others as to what the Lord had done for him. One way he wanted to do this was to make a public profession by being baptized. However, the church we were attending at the time, as a REQUIREMENT, instead of DISCIPLESHIP, desired him to take a class. A class that covered what it meant to be a child of Jesus Christ, and what baptism was for, etc. Now, My husband and I, were naturally, not against our son taking the class, but the reasoning was wrong. The church refused to let him be baptized unless he took it, and were making him wait until they were having another class, which by the way, was going to be held sometime in the Spring. Our son, however, could not grasp this. Every time he asked the reasoning behind as to why he had to wait to be baptized, he would burst into tears because although we did our best to explain "WHY", he just could not understand.
As a result of our frustration and being at a standstill of what to do, my husband and I sought wisdom and wise counsel from my older sister. My sister reminded us of the scripture where Philip, shared the Gospel, with the Ethiopian Eunuch, and who afterwards, asked Philip what kept him from being baptized. Philip's response was "If thou believest with all thine heart, thou mayest." There was no requirement on Philip's part for the Ethiopian Eunuch to take a class as a prerequisite for baptism. When they came to water, they both entered in, and the Ethiopian Eunuch was baptized. (Acts 8:25-38) Another Scripture my sister brought to our attention was Mark 10:14, where Jesus states "Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God." Jesus was displeased that the disciples were holding back the children who desired to be with Him. My sister's belief, and one my husband and I could not disagree with, was that our current church family was doing the same to our son. Not only were they blocking his path to Jesus, but they were prohibiting him from obedience as well. As a result...my sister invited us to come up to their place and baptize our son alongside his cousin, which we readily accepted. We were not going to hinder our son from Jesus or obedience.
Now...I could focus on all the hurt and frustration that we experienced through that frustration. However, that is not the reason as to why I share the above story, but....
I totally understand if you are battling hurt, frustration, and anger. I am speaking to myself, as well, as I type…I struggle with this still…
My encouragement and prayer is to not allow anger or grudges to fester. I understand being hurt more than you know. Trust me. However, holding onto hurt and anger only hurts us and our loved ones. If one does have some grudges that are being held onto, another encouragement I would offer up is to go to whoever hurt, (Matthew 18:15-17). Do not allow the sun to go down on your wrath. (Ephesians 4:26)
My relationships with those who have hurt me are no longer the same or current, including my trust in and with them, and it has taken a while to forgive and move on. And by the way...what I mean by “move on” is focusing on the present and future. However, if I do linger on the past, that anger and hurt start to rear it’s ugly head. Before God, I couldn’t continue living in that way. I had to forgive. Not just because it was hurting me, but because I am to forgive as Christ forgave me. Holding onto those grudges, now that I’m praying on what to say, I’m realizing that holding onto all that anger, frustration, and hurt only caused me to trust the Lord less. And...that’s not want the Lord wants.
Our lives are filled with highs and lows, and I, personally, will never forget those who have wronged me. However, I am to forgive 70x7, repeatedly, for, Christ continues to forgive me when I screw up. (Matthew 18:21-22)
So...in short...suffer not yourself from being forgiving as Christ forgave us. It's okay to have those feelings of hurt, anger, and frustration, however...it is not okay to stay there, and allow all those feelings to control our lives. That is definitely not what Jesus desires for us or commands. We are to grow and mature in our faith.
"For, I am not where I need to be, but I am not where I used to be, either."
